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Hermione Chase , A daughter of Zeus

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Hermione Chase , A daughter of Zeus Empty Hermione Chase , A daughter of Zeus

Post  Hermione Chase Mon Oct 28, 2013 10:03 am

Name : Hermione Chase
Age : 15
God Parent : Zeus
Mortal Parent : Emmeline Chase
Years in Camp : 0
Brief History : I had been playing a game of chess with my mom when a half – man , half – bull came barging inside our house . Luckily my History teacher came and slashed him with a pen which with one click , turned into a sword . He then told me that I had to go to this camp . I asked why but he rushed me to this camp .
Physical Appearance : Eye Color is Electric Blue . Has blonde hair which comes to the shoulder . Pale Skin .
Personality : I am rude but I am also kind . I do extremely well in training . I have acrophobia that means , I am afraid of heights .
Fatal Flaw : Pride . I am extremely proud about my strength and knowledge but it is the that has failed me at times .
Talents : I am a jack – of – all – trades . I am good at everything I do . I can manipulate the mist . As a child of Zeus , I am stronger than most of the demigods . I can send powerful amounts of static shock throughout another’s body on contact , Things that belong to my father’s domain will do whatever I ask , I have a strong leadership quality , I can manipulate electricity and lightning and I also have some control over the air and sky.
Weapons : I have a bow , shield , spear , dagger and a lightning bolt ( A gift from Zeus on my birthday ) .



Hermione Chase

Posts : 1
Drachmae : 3
Join date : 2013-10-28

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Hermione Chase , A daughter of Zeus Empty Re: Hermione Chase , A daughter of Zeus

Post  GeneralArin Mon Oct 28, 2013 10:11 am

It's achingly similar to several cannon characters. We prefer our characters to be different. Try to either make it a more generic biography, focusing on his home life more, or be more creative with the encounter and mix things up. (Though either way you need a small summary of his life thus far.)

Your personality is way too short. All it really tells me is that you tend to be rude, but you mean well. Try to expand things. Perhaps relate your flaw to your personality closer. (Which can mean add confidence and such to your personality as well.)

'Jack-of-all-trades' should come with a 'master-of-none' downside. You can't just be good at everything, especially when you're just beginning. If you want to be good at something even though you just start out, give some reason for it in your bio, like you took a martial art or had some related hobby or something.

You can't have a lightning bolt. That's way too powerful, especially for some new camper. And you might not be able to be a Zeus kid at all, since we have a maximum on it. So if you do want to be a Zeus kid, this needs to be a lot better. (As in more thoroughly detailed, and visibly well-thought out.)

Similarly, manipulating the mist is also an experienced skill, and takes specific practice. For example, Percy still couldn't manage it while Thalia and Chiron could. As a general rule, talents should be unique to your character, and would be things that aren't implied by the typical parent powers.


This might seem like a lot right off the bat, but I'd like to help you get a good character up so you can join the roleplay.
GeneralArin
GeneralArin
RP Supervisor/SoldierA

Posts : 2791
Drachmae : 6263
Join date : 2009-05-29
Age : 29
Location : In my own little world....it's okay: they know me there.

Character sheet
Olympian Parent: Hephaestus
Items :

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