hating life on the beach

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hating life on the beach

Post  camcam9999 on Wed Feb 16, 2011 7:50 pm

Cameron walked around the beach still crying from when he was sobbing in the woods looked to the sky and yelled. He thought to himself the person i loved ripped out my heart and threw it to the ground and now i have to deal with monster fighting and not getting killed i wish this would all just end. Cameron fell to his knees and punshed the ground in remorse and layed down and sobbed.


Last edited by camcam9999 on Wed Feb 16, 2011 9:28 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Re: hating life on the beach

Post  GeneralArin on Wed Feb 16, 2011 8:36 pm

Issues much? Btw, roleplay advice. You don't need to go AAhH. the "and yelled" gives us that. There's no dialogue here so you don't need to go fifty lines with a's and h's. If you want someone to roleplay with you, you'll need to make a more replyable post. Personally, I'd say this is really hard to post to.
Please try to post more than one sentance. Maybe add thoughts, or in this case: add *why* you're having major issues.
Oh, And commas would also be nice. <http://owl.english.purdue.edu/owl/resource/607/02/>

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Re: hating life on the beach

Post  camcam9999 on Wed Feb 16, 2011 9:01 pm

OOC: kk ill edit the post
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Re: hating life on the beach

Post  Wolfy/Erik on Sun Feb 20, 2011 2:50 pm

...Jake is the new grammar queen, declared by me...
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