New Character: Wesley Majors

Name: Wesley Majors
Age: 14
Godly Parent: Athena
Mortal family: James Majors (father, clear sighted) Lily Stephans-Majors (step mother) Megan Stephans-Majors (mortal half-sister)
Years at camp: new, 1st year
History: Wesley grew up living with only his father in a small town in Georgia until he was eight. His father, James, didn’t talk about his mother much, just that she was a high school history teacher like he was, and that one day she just up and vanished.  Then, he met Lily. Wesley was a little sad at first that he was going to marry someone else, but she made him happy and she was good to Wesley, treating him just as well as she would a biological son. She was even willing to follow them to New York City when James got another teaching job. When Wesley was twelve, Lily had another child with James, a little girl they named Megan. He often enjoyed her company. Then, on his fourteenth birthday he had his first monster attack. He was on the school bus. There had been a small chance a tropical storm would move in that day, but that was the norm in New York that time of year. It never happened. That day, however, it did. The bus was battered by strong winds and rain. As Wesley watched the wind wip the trees around, a black cloud crashed through the windshield. The cloud took the shape of a large black horse and came after him. He eventually made his way home. There, his father shot the storm spirit with a bronze tipped arrow and it decentigrated. That he was the day he told him everything, then took him to camp.
Physical appearance: tall, slightly muscular build. Shaggy, unkept black hair and green eyes. pale skin, often with pimples on his nose and forehead. He usually wears dark, unflattering cloths to hide what he thinks is an unfit physique, despite being quite healthy.
Personality: shy, usually keeps to himself. He will talk to someone if they approach him, but until he feels comfturable with them, he will mainly give one word responces. Being raised in a small town in the southern U.S, chivalry comes naturally to him. He is more than willing to help anyone who needs it, but is easily intimidated. Once he opens himself up to someone, he is actually quite funny, often telling jokes, and is very loyal.
Fatal flaw: trust. Wesley’s greatest weakness manifests itself in two ways: one is his willingness to give people second chances. No matter how many times someone hurts him or a friend, if they ask him for forgiveness, he will almost always give it to them. The other is his belief that people can change. He believes if he befriends an enemy he can help them change, not even concidering the great risk of them betraying him. These two combined add up to him not being able to hold a grudge. No matter how many times someone treats him badly or even hurts him, his innermost beliefs wont let him stop trusting them and wanting to help them.
Talents: unlike other children of Athena, he is more artistic than logical. He can draw, paint, sculpt, and other things. Also, unlike other Demigods, even those of Athena, he lacks Dyslexia, and has a very good understanding of the English language. He can write poetry, stories, anything.
Weapons: a long black sword of spray-painted Celestial Bronze. its holster is magical, so it the mortal world it can take the form of a backpack.

"There had been a small chance a tropical storm would move in that day, but that was the norm in New York that time of year. It never happened. That day, however, it did." What I'm getting from that is that they predicted a storm would move in that day, but it didn't. But it did. Which doesn't make sense. Please reword that.

I'm not sure how plausible it is that his father just happened to have a Celestial bronze arrow lying around, and managed to land a killing blow on the storm spirit with it. He'd have to be a pretty good shot already, and it is hard to kill storm spirits, since they're, you know, storms. So please make sure that that's explained.

The hallmark of a child of Athena is blond(e) hair and gray eyes. We usually allow different hair colors, but it would be preferred if you changed his eye color from green to gray.

Keep in mind that if he's spray-painted his sword, it will still chip away at the edges from being used, and occasionally sharpened as well.

I will say that it's good to know he's got pimples. xD Virtually every teenager will have those, and it never hurts to be reminded of flaws, whether they are physical ones or characteristic.

thanks for the advice! ill be shore to work on my character. this site and the people on it look great, i cant wait to be a part of it!

No problem.  And yeah, it really is pretty awesome here. Once you're done editing, by the way, just bump this thread again and I (and the other staff members) will give it another look and see if you're good to go.

Name: Wesley Majors
Age: 14
Godly Parent: Athena
Mortal family: James Majors (father, clear sighted) Lily Stephans-Majors (step mother) Megan Stephans-Majors (mortal half-sister)
Years at camp: new, 1st year
History: Wesley grew up living with only his father in a small town in Georgia until he was eight. His father, James, didn’t talk about his mother much, just that she was a high school history teacher like he was, and that one day she just up and vanished.  Then, he met Lily. Wesley was a little sad at first that he was going to marry someone else, but she made him happy and she was good to Wesley, treating him just as well as she would a biological son. She was even willing to follow them to New York City when James got another teaching job. When Wesley was twelve, Lily had another child with James, a little girl they named Megan. He often enjoyed her company. Then, on his fourteenth birthday he had his first monster attack. It was his birthday, and his father gave him a necklace with a sword decoration, saying it was from his mother who had wanted him to get it on his fourteenth birthday. He was on the school bus. There had been a small chance a hurricane  would move in that day, but that was the norm in New York that time of year. It never happened. That day, however, it did. The bus was battered by strong winds and rain. As Wesley watched the wind wip the trees around, a black cloud crashed through the windshield. The cloud took the shape of a large black horse and came after him. He managed to throw himself out of the back, but the monster was right on top of him. Then, he heard a voice in the back of his head, “Squeeze the necklace.” It whispered. He snapped the necklace off and squeezed it. It then grew into a full blown sword. He swatted it away enough to stand and it charged him. He swun at it a few times as it wipped him around like a toy until he finally leanred to distract it with the shine of the sword and nailed it when it was solid. Then, he followed the voice into the city, where he met Tyler, a styr, who gueded him to camp.
Physical appearance: tall, slightly muscular build. Shaggy, unkept black hair and green eyes. pale skin, often with pimples on his nose and forehead. He usually wears dark, unflattering cloths to hide what he thinks is an unfit physique, despite being quite healthy.
Personality: shy, usually keeps to himself. He will talk to someone if they approach him, but until he feels comfturable with them, he will mainly give one word responces. Being raised in a small town in the southern U.S, chivalry comes naturally to him. He is more than willing to help anyone who needs it, but is easily intimidated. Once he opens himself up to someone, he is actually quite funny, often telling jokes, and is very loyal. He is a bookworm and is very intelligent. He is quite skittish but is brave when he needs to be. He enjoys learning, often spending time in the local library. He takes great pride in being a child of Athena, standing up to people who question the value of intelligence. He wasn’t very into sports before arriving at camp, but quickly took up the sword fighting and archery. Despite this, he is a thinker, being more comfortable with the “technical” aspects of actual battle.
Fatal flaw: trust. Wesley’s greatest weakness manifests itself in two ways: one is his willingness to give people second chances. No matter how many times someone hurts him or a friend, if they ask him for forgiveness, he will almost always give it to them. The other is his belief that people can change. He believes if he befriends an enemy he can help them change, not even concidering the great risk of them betraying him. These two combined add up to him not being able to hold a grudge. No matter how many times someone treats him badly or even hurts him, his innermost beliefs wont let him stop trusting them and wanting to help them.
Talents: unlike other children of Athena, he is more artistic than logical. He can draw, paint, sculpt, and other things. Also, he can speak Greek easily.
Weapons: a long celestial bronze sword that, in the mortal world, is disguised as a necklace

ok first off, please just edit the original app, rather than repost. your post has been spaced properly to make it easier to read also.

You're history has a few plot holes. first off if the winds are strong enough to give the bus noticeable trouble, it's probably more likely classified as a hurricane at that point, just to clarify that. How the heck did he outrun a storm spirit long enough to get home. a person on foot can't outrun a normal horse for the most part. and Storm spirits can move alot faster. also if these winds were so strong, chances are the father would miss with an arrow, and even without factoring that in the dad isn't a trained archer. It's not easy to use a bow, let alone use one accurately, i know from experience. and with winds that strong it's not very believable. And Athena knew he would actually be able to use this bow? and have improbable aiming skills? considering she's the goddess of wisdom I'm sure she wouldn't leave that much to chance.

Not all demigods have dyslexia, this is pointed out in the books, though it is common among demigods. Normally Dio kid's don't have it though. I'm just going to say don't have your talents reliant on other charries abilities. also you mention "unlike other children of Athena, he is more artistic than logical." there are plenty of people who are both artistic and logical...heck i don't see how one has anything to do with the other.

You should expand on your personality, because right now it doesn't actually tell me much about who your character is, just how they act around others. What makes this character themselves? are they the type to charge the dragon? or run the opposite way? Are they impulsive or tactical? This should give me an idea of who your character is, not just what they act like around other people.

ok, thanks! should i delete the second post? and if so, how do i do that? XD

well I would need to delete my post, so just leave it

ok, changed it! if this isn't what your looking for, could you please give me some sort of example? thanks!

Alright I'll give you a pass, except for the fact you upped your age. Because of the promise the gods made to percy in the last book, all demigods are technically supposed to be claimed at 13, though sometimes the gods may overlook them until 14. so no New campers can be older than that. Fix that and your good, wait for another staff to comment though.

oh, woops, that age was in the older sheet and i forgot to change it. XD thanks for all the help, man, i really appreciate it!

Looks pretty good. I'd just watch out how shy you make him, since it's hard to role-play with others if you don't talk. Other than that, I can't really think of anything to add.

Approved. Have fun RPing!

yay!! lol thank you! ill be shore to keep that in mind!